"The most important of life's battles is the one we fight daily in the silent chambers of the soul."

Tuesday, May 08, 2007

Sunday Sunrise

Thy sun shall no more go down; neither shall thy moon withdraw itself: for the LORD shall be thine everlasting light, and the days of thy mourning shall be ended.
Isaiah 16:20

After the long night, you are sunrise. This thought hangs in the back of my mind about that night. His soul ascending with the coming of the dawn that Sunday morning. The shadows of darkness that surrounded him was evidence of the sun. He knew the midnight.

He kept asking what time of day it was. Asking whether the sun was rising or setting. I couldn't understand in my ignorance what difference it made. But looking back I believe he was waiting for the coming
of his Lord to free him from that frail body.

His Lord was the only one that could make him whole again. He never complained about the load he had to bear in this life. He would keep on the same path he was on. Though he wandered from that path by trying to take shortcuts, they always seemed to lead right back to that path. The easy path would not have shaped him the way God wanted, too. Easy paths lead you astray.

Something beautiful came out of his broken body and suffering for he knew it was not the end. The shadows of darkness and every bitter chill made him ready. To find out, what I never understood, that Jesus is sunrise. He waited for that Sunday morning sunrise for him. How could he have know this if he didn't know the night.

He was always searching the horizon above the city with his eyes. He seemed to be looking past me and past the horizon. He seemed to look for that special light. The light of a new dawn.

I wonder if he ever doubted in that darkness. But when I thought he doubted that smile returned. I think he knew that shadows come first before the rising of the sun. And that was all the evidence he needed.

Jesus alone will be our light and shine brighter than any star. He alone is the resurrection that makes everything new. The light that makes beautiful blue skies. Our Lord was resurrected on the sabbath, and he took my father home on the morning of the sabbath.

His heart that morning as the Sun came up must have been saying,"Thank You, Thank You. After this long terrible night, Jesus you alone are my sunrise."

As I watched the sun coming up, its beams broke through over the buildings. It drove away every last bit of night. I sit in that window looking out so many stories over Memphis and cried. I looked back at him. His body was just a shell. That was no longer him. He was out there. Outside on those rays of sunlight. He was with his Creator. Feeling the warmth of the sun on him. But this warmth was pure love. Something we just can't comprehend.

I looked back at my family and said, "This is a good day for the sun has rose, and he has went with it."

I still miss him terribly and probably always will. I am sure all of heaven has heard me cry. But sometimes my faith caves in and my soul feels like God is gone. So I continue to lose my way and search my soul at each twist and turn.
Lance Gargus

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